The Real Me
by JEFangirl18
Summary: Since Tamaki's class is writing about themselves, Tamaki thought he should have everybody write one about themselves. Now it's time for Hikaru and Haruhi. Slight angst.
1. Tamaki

The Real Me

The Real Me

Tamaki's class is writing a short story or poem thingy and the teacher is gonna read it out loud to the class. The trick is that the class isn't suppose to figure out who it is.

'They don't understand the pain I go through. The fact they pretend they know me makes me feel happy, yet, very sad. Sometimes I want them to feel my pain too. To feel why I become antisocial or a while, to feel like I have to smile. They put that pressure on me. Everytime I frown they worry, every time tears escape my eyes they ask whats wrong.

Part of me want that, it wants them to worry, but the part I made, the part that's not me, takes over and I smile, a fake smile, and tell them not to worry.

The part I molded, the part that took so long to be perfected, the part that fools everyone…is slowly disappearing. The part that makes everyone happy and the one that everyone wants to know, and that everyone loves, is slowly fading. The part of me that fakes that fake smile and fakes the family is fading into nothing…and the real me is coming out…

My true self is coming out, weither I want it to, or not. And so far, they don't see a difference.

They see a guy who will smile through the tough times and will help anyone with anything. A guy who can't feel sadness, or pain. A guy who never has problems of his own. A guy that can never stop smiling, or laughing, or helping.

That guy doesn't exist. He's the mold, the fake me. They don't see that. They see what they want to and only hear what they want to. When I become quiet, they don't notice. When I'm sad, They don't show any concern. When I'm suffering through my own problems, they don't help, or even listen. Whenever a word comes out of my mouth, they talk about themselves.

They need to open their eyes and see, I'm not who I pretend to be. They need to hear my screams for acceptance for they real me. If they never do, then I might live as long as I should. I won't be able to survive this thing called life.'

Tamaki finished reading what he wrote and felt the tears falling down his cheeks. He knew everything was what he really felt, but he also knew that if people found out, they would shun him…and he would last less if that happened.

"I'll just write something else. Something the fake me would write." He said as he put what he read up on a wall…near a picture of him and the host club. "I hope they can help me soon." He whispered to himself as he put it up.

If you guys really like it, then I'll put up a chapter for every character…but, put it in the reviews. Please review.


	2. Kyoya

The Real Me

I have made this into a chapter series. There will be a poem for every character. This time is Kyouya's poem. I wrote this especially for Kyoya, I hope you like it.

* * *

'All I want is priase, I don't understand  
How come you always praise them  
I'm just as good, just as smart  
Most people think I'm a work of art  
I'm always successful in everything I do  
But just because I have a brother, or two  
Everything I do  
Isn't good enough for you  
I do everything I could  
And everything I should  
But I'm invisible in your eyes  
Nothing I do is a surprise  
Everything is expected of me  
I can never be free  
I did everything you bid  
Even when I was a kid  
I ignored the call of fun and play  
And the warmth of a sunshine day  
So I could help you and make you proud  
Everyday, sun or cloud  
I befriended all of them  
Just so you could make amends  
I even befriended the Souh heir  
Even though he was floating on air  
Through him and this club  
I'm finally having fun  
The twins teasing father  
because unrequited love's a bother  
Hunni and his addiction  
Mori, always with him  
Haruhi always inbetween  
Never understanding anything  
And the gourgous girl who calls herself our manager  
I've realised now, I can't live without her  
I see her everwhere I go  
But something nobody will ever know  
Is how much I truly love  
The angel Renge, sent from up above  
I'm just glad to see her face  
Everywhere at anyplace  
I don't need your praise anymore  
I don't care, that's for sure  
I noe have friends who I like  
And I'll be with them, day or night.'

Kyoya looked over his poem, knowing that he could never turn that in. He would be the laughing stock of the school, and disgraced by the family.

"It's not like I care anymore." he said to himself. He put the poem up next to a picture of Renge and the club. "She'll know soon enough though." He went back to writing the poem he'd actually turn in.

* * *

This poem I wrote just for Kyoya, and I like the way it turned out. Please review me your thoughts.

JA NE FOR NOW!


	3. Kaoru

The Real Me

In case people actually are reading this...SORRY!!! Kaoru is up now ...and he was soooo hard to write about...BUT I FINALLY GOT IT!!! HERE IS HIS!!!

"Just because Tono's class is writeing about themselves, we have too?" Hikaru complained.

"Ya. I guess." Kaoru said. he was already deep in thought, and already writing his.

"Since your so into yours, I'll be watchin' tv." Hikaru said turing it on. Kaoru was used to this so he blocked out the sounds.

Kaoru stopped and was reading it over.

'We lived in our own world, My brother and I  
Nobody in, onlyus by our side  
He was with me, I was with him  
We could switch places on only a whim  
We were always together, never a part  
Then he came, Mr "Work-of-art"  
He said we could sell our brothery love  
And was talking about a host club  
My brother liked the idea of it  
And since I stay near him, I did as he bid  
Since the start a fear began to grow  
Something I did not know  
I was inside me, always safe  
sleeping inside me, just coming awake  
Then she came in, and I definatly knew  
I loved my brother more then brothers usally do  
Since my realisation nobody knows  
But reacently, it's starting to show  
It's hard to hid it, hard to pretend  
That he doesn't like me the way I like him  
I know her, I know he likes the girl  
So much, it makes me want to hurl  
He doesn't need her  
but its her he's after  
I could be better for him  
My loves not a whim  
But, if he's happy, then so am I  
Besides, I know I won't die  
he likes her, thats all there is too it  
But I never said I'd be happy about it.'

"God. I can't believe I wrote that." Kaoru said. "I need to start a new one."

"What'd you write about?" Hikaru asked.

"Trash." He said. He folded it up and kept it in his pocket.

* * *

This poem I wrote ESPECIALLY for him! you like it? please review if you actually read this thing.


	4. Hikaru

The Real Me

Now is Hikaru! I'm sooo sorry this is taking so long! To much homework, damn teachers.

* * *

Kaoru was asleep and Hikaru was writting his poem, it was taking him a while, but when he finally finished he read it for mistakes.

'I see her everyday,  
I always look her way,  
I try to make her smile,  
And I try not to be vile,  
My heart beats fast when ever she's near  
Sometimes it seems so loud I think she can hear  
She makes me happy  
And my heart achy  
But there's one problem  
And for me, its rather fearsome  
She looks at another  
Next to him, I'm the begger  
He can do everything I can't  
I feel like an ant  
I'm scared that with him  
My flame will be extingused on only a whim  
I'm always alone, and I'm sick of it  
Even if I was to admit  
He's better at everything I do  
And that I always knew  
He's the prince, the king  
I'm just a lowly commener, a thing  
He just needs help, someone to push him  
Someone like us, his pretend kin  
I just want to be loved, and told apart  
But she's the only who could that art  
But she's with the king, and I'm alone  
By my self, reading at home  
I wish she's happy, with Tono  
And that they can go  
And be together, whenever they can  
Please make it their plan.'

Hikaru looked that over and tears were leaving his eyes. "God, I sound...different. Weird thing." He said putting it in his drawer, hoping his brother wouldn't find it.

* * *

I like this one, what do you think? Please review my imaginary fans!


	5. Haruhi

The Real Me

YAY! I wrote this poem a while a go and I thought it fit Haruhi prefectly! Here it is.

* * *

Haruhi was doing her assigments, when she rembered her poem for the Host club.

'I thought I was done too! Man!' She thought as she grabbed a piece of paper and couldn't figure out what to write about. Then her mind went to the time Tamaki almost left the host club with Eclair. She didn't even notice her hand was moving till it stopped. She decied, for a laugh, to read it.

'My heart aches to be with you, the one person I can't be with  
I loved you with all my heart but, apperently, that's not enough  
You just left and I'm hurting inside, I can't feel any emotions  
Then I see you with her and my anger seeps through my veins  
What does she have that I don't? What does she do that I can't?  
I was told that if you truely loved someone, you would do anything to make them happy  
But They never told me it's hurt this much to see it happen  
You made me feel whole, complete, now I feellike an empty vessel  
I wish you could be here, next to me so I could see your smile  
Hear you talk to me, share something with me that nobody else knows  
Now you smile for her, tell her secrets into her ear  
I would like to be your friend, at least  
But I can't stand to see you with her  
Please tell me what I can do, I just want you back  
I want you to love me again, but I guess that won't happen.'

Haruhi dreid her tears hoping that none of them would land on her poem. She knew she felt like this when he left, and now she knew why.

"I love Tamaki. And I can't help it." she whisperred into the night. She put that poem in her binder, so she could read it later. She had to work on a different poem before she went to sleep. "Damn, handsome Tamaki." she said giggling.

* * *

I wrote this a while ago, AND IT'S AWSOME!!!! This actually happened to my friend, and I wrote it for him. Anyways, please read and review!


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